AOA体育平台

A cancer diagnosis is a life changing moment for patients and their loved ones. Although it can be hard to listen and talk with someone who has cancer, and to understand what they鈥檙e really going through, there are things you can say and do to make the journey easier for them.

In my five years of experience as a cancer nurse, two tips I would share are:

1. Be specific in your offer of help
   Instead of saying things like 鈥榣et me know if you need anything,鈥� why not offer to do the school run, drive them to their next medical appointment or do the weekly shop 鈥� practical suggestions really help the patient manage day-to-day tasks.
2. Be an active listener
   Try not to listen to the patient with a view to responding. Remember, this is about them and their journey, not yours. Try asking open questions or replaying back with what you鈥檝e heard to check that you鈥檝e understood. Remember, you do not need to have all the answers as listening well can go a long way.

Dr Nick Maisey, Consultant Medical Oncologist at AOA体育平台, has some extra advice: 鈥淲hen someone is going through the devastating emotions of a cancer diagnosis, don't forget that they are human.

"Don't be scared to ask how they are and what worries them. A human touch can be just as powerful as expert clinical care.鈥� 

As well as the dos, there are also some things we should avoid saying to someone with cancer. 

• Avoid comments such as, "It鈥檒l be alright", "You鈥檙e very strong" or "You鈥檝e got such a positive mindset"
  Normally, these comments are good to hear, but for a cancer patient they don鈥檛 help. Emotions often fluctuate as they go through treatment and I know comments like these can set patients back.
• "I know how you feel"
  The chances are you don鈥檛 know exactly how the patient feels. Patients themselves may not know how they feel, and implying you do can exacerbate these feelings and make them feel out of touch. Try putting yourself in their shoes when listening and talking with them.
• Be careful when using humour
  I would try and avoid humour or jokes if they are talking about feeling sad or worried. Sometimes it can help, but it may make things difficult.

Further information

• Read more about cancer care